As we travel on the paths we choose through the journey of life sometimes we hit the odd pothole that throws us for a while, where we may stumble or we may fall. The main thing we have to do in these times that we fall or go off track as to how we have planned our life is to seek positives in all bad situations. I can hear a lot of you saying "Sure easy for you to say" as if I am living a perfect life without these hiccups or disasters. But in actual fact I am going through a living hell of my own right now but know that I have to seek positives no matter how dark the skies may appear!
FALLING INTO THE ABYSS
I had the next few years of my life planned out to a T of what I was going to do and achieve and with this plan in place I was making giant strides forward equipping my business both with equipment as well as mentally focused. After working for a number of Cowboy companies as a tiler I saw that there was a great opportunity to start my own tiling business focusing on quality and charging the customers accordingly. I had a load of contracts in place and everything was ticking along nicely before the unthinkable happened!
WHEN MY WORLD CAME CRASHING
This day started like any other day cheerful rise breakfast then off to the job site being a house with a young couple doing up their house. I gave this couple a really good deal as I wanted to see right by them and everything was going to plan until the unthinkable happened!!
The builder was carrying a stove across a new floor I had laid and one of the guys was slipping with his grip so I rushed over to help. I did not expect the other guys to let go leaving me with the entire weight of this wetback oven. Subsequently I felt an enormous amount of pain and I knew instantly that I had done some serious damage, as I had previously hurt my back some years prior that required Orthopedic surgery placing metal and screws in my spine!!
After a visit to the doctor I was given pain relief as I was sure that this would subside after a few days but this was not to be the case as my pain intensified that led me to being admitted to hospital a short time later. This was where my Nightmare was about to begin that you can read about here.
Pauls Med Nightmare From this point on I had to look for positives and some days that is really hard to do!!
FINDING POSITIVES WHEN TIMES ARE BAD
This is where I bring you to the subject of this Blog, about finding positives when things are bad. No matter how drastically our lives have changed we have to look for positives because if we do not look for and find positives we will only fall deeper into a world of despair that has lead many before us to a point of doing the unthinkable. I have been here where I had thoughts of ending my life and my suffering but I have managed to find reasons to live.
My positives I started to find in the early parts of my recovery were very simple ones like being able to get through another day gradually setting goals like being able to drink water by myself to being able to wipe my own bottom after going to the toilet. You may think that these are not positives and be thinking of bigger goals like taking your life back instantly to how you had planned it. But in reality we have to start off with small goals before we can focus on goals like getting the life we had back.
Over the weeks in hospital everyday I set goals some I achieved and others I did not,but I was always sure to remind myself of a positive for each and every day. I know that some days we feel that it is too hard, the pain is too severe but we have to push those thoughts aside and make the best of what we have, as quitting is not an option.
It has been nearly eight months now and I am still finding positives even though in the back of my mind I know that I will more than likely not be able to return to those plans and that life. Taking that onboard and accepting it is very hard but I would sooner accept it and anything close to that life would be a major success. I am 48 almost 49 years of age and thinking about alternatives is not nice but through workshops I have attended I have seen others that are worse off than I and seeing that really put things into perspective for me, as I know things could be worse.
ALTERNATIVE OPTIONS POSITIVES
Having attended workshops doing woodwork I have found something I have always liked and enjoyed doing. I know that I am getting rather long in the tooth to start a new career that may take me a couple of years to get qualified and I most likely will not ever make the sort of money that I am use to earning, but the positives outweigh the negatives. The positives would be being able to be creative making furniture the old way using techniques such as dowel and biscuit joins along with dove tailing taking away the conventional method of nailing everything.
The money would be less initially but with positive thinking I am sure I can make a comfortable living if not better than that producing custom pieces that will outlive me. Knowing that I would be creating pieces that could or would be handed down from generation to generation is very rewarding in itself. I know that I am in for a long hard road trying to get well at the same time as making sacrifices but these sacrifices will be worth the effort.
We can all find positives in every day and I implore you to follow the steps I have taken and will continue to take finding all those p[ositives no matter how small they may be, as there is always somebody that is worse off than you are. Count yourself lucky as I count myself lucky as I have life and I will watch my children grow and hopefully see grandchildren in the years to follow as I am a positive thinker and I will succeed down this pathway that has been set for me. With a little help from others I can and I will succeed in whatever life throws at me as I know how to find positives when the skies have darkened.
FINDING YOUR POSITIVES
No matter what your life was like before you had a setback or a total transformation of life you must stay true to yourself and look for positives no matter how small they may be. If your only positive is waking up then that is a big positive taking that next breathe and the one after that is all positives as we heal as much as we can.
Always be thankful for the life that you have as that is yours and it is worth living no matter how insignificant you may feel it is your life and it IS worth striving forward.
I use to feel sorry for myself and feel bitter and angry as to what has happened to me, but I know these are wasted emotions and anger is a disease that will slowly eat at you until nothing is left unless you take action and let the negativity go.
I remind myself that there is always someone else that has it harder than I do and there is always someone worse off than you are! For all people finding positives is essential as we are all human beings that have so much to give and so much to enjoy
Please keep finding positives! I cannot emphasize this point as it is so important that we
KEEP FINDING POSITIVES
Paul Morris Christchurch NZ
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For the majority of us we find it very easy noticing faults about others that we discuss with mutual friends etc, but how do you like being made aware of the faults you have? I do not think that we like to try to find faults about ourselves or take onboard others criticism about the faults we have, But in order to grow and expand our minds we must first look at ourselves before we judge others! This i know is a hard thing to do.
